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and be a player with the fact you are an international student, people think thats badass.Īlso try and get some girls as friends, not every girl has to be your lover. just be presentable, dress like you're always going to a job interview. love starwars and nerdy shit, wear a shirt of what you like, but also wear jewelry and nice shoes and a nice over shirt. you can't even imagine how many people you will attract if you just be yourself in a cool presentable way. i used to be 500 pounds, dropped out of school, and every girl i've talked to always ended up calling me gross and ugly, this destroyed my self esteem, even now that i lost 300 of that and i live a healthy life, i still find myself being extremely shy in social situations.īut man, you gotta try to get out of that comfort zone, you gotta try and be cool with people, be yourself. Man, I used to be in a very similar situation. (Also, if I choose to do so in college, it'll be my first taste of alcohol, which will shock a few people I'd imagine.) I mean I know step 1 of gaining confidence as a fat guy. I remember once being told that they would pay me to shut up. Oh and on the rare moments of me actually talking instead of being super quiet and reserved, people seem to want me to shut the hell up. Not surprising, but this is all because of my extremely low self esteem and confidence. I'm also scared of regretting not having some fun in college. I'm scared of people in general and I have awful conversational skills. I'm scared of meeting new people in a city, state and country I've never been to. I never been to parties, but I don't want to miss out on one if I somehow do like parties. Of course there are clubs and events and parties. I'll be in dorms of course, but I fucked up and got a dorm in a hall where there are no freshman (at least according to the FB page). When I do go to college in the US this fall, I'll be 20 and a freshman. One thing that further lowered my confidence and self esteem was me hearing about how international students don't make close American friends. This'll also be a first because it'll be my first time in America (international student here so) and it might or might not be the worst year of my life. Everyone on the facebook page is all excited and happy, and I'm just getting anxious day by day. (I dropped out twice before out of severe depression). (as a middle schooler, this was the only reason I didn't mind these sessions)īut, I'm 19, 20 when I start college again in the fall. They were going to teach me to have a conversation with a complete stranger (bring in a random student), and even with girls. The thing is, they were supposed to teach me over the course of a few months, and they seemed to forget about it.
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Hell my conversational skills are so bad that the guidance counselors in middle school tried to teach me how to have a conversation. It also doesn't help that I never made many friends and I couldn't hold a conversation with my friends very well anyways. I look much better with my glasses on, but I still feel like I look ugly and creepy. The low self confidence probably comes from that, along with physically and emotionally abusive parents. The low self esteem came from years and years of being called too ugly, fat, weird, creepy, and so on.
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I got a big dream in my life but I know it will not happen because it is impossible for me and too far from being realized, and my big dream in life is to meet One Direction, and given to them a big hug, stayed and talked with them a good time to tell them in the days that I spent watching their video and the day I cried with joy when they won the NRJ day I cried watching the lucky fans who had the chance to meet One Direction or the Also see on stage but I have not had that chance and I know I'll never have, but even if all that I still keep hoping that one day I'll be in their arms and have a better view not a computer screen or TV but a real god to pray every day for a chance among millions and billions only god can know how much I love this group, this group is ultimately the best band I've ever seen they are the best and they will remain the best, and I would love to meet with their girlfriends parcequ 'they are nice and caring and very beautiful like Sophia and Eleanor.